A Song Crowdsourced from Twitter

December 7, 2010 at 9:16 pm | Posted in Just for fun, Music, True Stories | 2 Comments

So once I was bored in Hollywood.  Bored at Le Pain Quotidien in Brentwood to be more specific, since I’d been stood up for a meeting. Now, bored is really not my M.O. — on principle I am almost never bored — but Twitter is always there for me in such emergencies.  So of course that’s where I turned.

I wanted to write but I lacked inspiration.  So as an exercise I promised Twitter I would use every single idea they pitched at me in a single song. With rhyming.  The list of terms/references Twitter provided, within about two hours, follows:

Swine Flu
hipsters
root beer
bad movies
comic books/superheroes
Angsty bandmates
amusement parks
Modern pop songs suck
Jung/Freud/philosophy
Tamagotchi
The coolest guy in San Diego
Construction
Matador
Favorite Color
Monkey/organ grinder
Firefly reference
BSG
Coffee
The known, the unknown, and the underknown
Finger puppets
Sharpies & glitter
Windows Vista/blue screen of death
tech support
Armageddon/tea (points if you’ve been around Twitter long enough to remember this meme)

Here’s what I came up with. I rediscovered it recently and it made the corner of my mouth go up a little — you know the way — because it’s on topic for me lately.  And I like a few of the images.  So I thought I would share it with its co-creators.

Disclaimers: 1) the rhyme scheme’s a little obtuse, but that’s typical for me (with music it makes sense).  2) If you want to imagine how it would sound, there are lots of electric guitars and drums in this one.  3) No, I won’t record it, I don’t think, it was just an exercise.  4)  Also, it’s too long, but that is again typical of me.  5) It’s more complainy and current and socio/political than my own voice usually is, but then, Twitter’s rather complainy and current etc., so I was being true to my co-writers’ voices.  6) You may note that a little snippet later transmuted into part of “The Avocado Song.”

Oh, and fittingly, I was issued a parking citation for letting my meter run out while I composed this little ditty.  Anyway — enjoy the wordplay!

Hard to Hold by Marian Call & Twitter

They’re drilling holes in the 405 — it makes our sunburnt ears all hurt
And the coolest guy in all of San Diego — even he must wait to merge
He’s in every other car along the interstate, adjusts his aviators in the mirror
His pets are electronic, his insomnia is chronic, his friends are all ironic
He’s going to see the show tonight and he’s warming up by practicing his sneer

They’re drilling holes in the 405 — to put our worst of worries in
They’ve outsourced tech support to warmer climates — and sued away our sins
So we’ll have time to curse at Windows Vista and mourn for BSG
And laugh at #firstworldproblems, and mock ‘em when they rob us, and charge it if we’re jobless
Smart enough and loud enough and self-aware enough to always win

Along comes a spider to propose a point of view
A high risk venture, an idealistic coup
Is he another organ grinder, is he a prophet underknown
He thought he’d dabble in the truth just for a change — I can’t quite get behind it though

‘Cause hope’s so hard to hold
Hope’s so hard to hold
Do I dare do I dare
Can I care anymore
Gonna leave me bleeding, oh…

They’re drilling holes in your will to live — got nothing better left to do
They built a superhero-themed amusement park — and it’s all about you
You’ve got your own hit single and an angsty rocker band
I’ll sip root beer at your movie — let your genius blow through me — the story don’t much move me
I laughed when you got swine flu, but in fairness the whole script’s a little bland

Aren’t you getting tired of propping up your heart
With flimsy little sucker sticks and fraying bits of twine
Of drawing blithe conclusions on cute recycled cards
With sharpies and with glitter — with some dry sarcastic movie quote inside

Oh, ‘cause hope’s so hard to hold
Hope’s so hard to hold
Do I dare do I dare
Can I care anymore
Gonna leave me bleeding, oh…but you hold, you hold, I say you hold…

Darlin’ I said darlin’ someday
You gonna keep what you took.
You gonna eat what you cook.
Darlin’ I said darlin’ someday
You gonna keep what you took.
You gonna eat what you cook.

You cannot build a car to run on sarcasm and pride
You cannot make a bull to charge who’s playing colorblind

They’re drilling holes in the 405 — but they’re not quite big enough to hold our fears
So if your favorite primetime show’s been slipping lately — save a couple tears
Our monitor has long been blue and frozen / but no one gots the guts to force-restart
We’re overcaffeinated, we’re overcompensated, our work is overrated
It’d be amusing what we’re losing if we didn’t deep down know we’ll miss our hearts

Aren’t you getting tired of all the nip and tuck
Of preening and rescreening your half-baked philosophy
Aren’t you getting tired of never looking up
Of parodizing Armageddon with pink smoke and finger puppets over tea

Oh, but hope’s so hard to hold
Hope’s so hard to hold
Do I dare do I dare
Can I care anymore
Gotta hold, you hold, you hold, I say you hold, oh…
Gonna leave me bleedin’, oh

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2 Comments »

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  1. You are a genius, really. This is brilliant on so many levels.


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